jamie ann

i can’t lie

December 20th, 2008 at 6:48 pm . Posted in Christmas, whiny things .

I’m still not feeling the Christmas spirit.

The tree is up but no presents are really under it. No one is really on top of thier Christmas shopping this year. Usually, I am all over it but this year I’m slacking.

My family is still in shambles. My mother pretends to care but I think the extent of Christmas to her is wanting to know what she is getting as presents. No, seriously, in our last conversation, she asked “what are you getting me?” then said, “well Sundance has cheap earrings” when I responded I’m pretty strapped for cash this season so not to expect anything big. Maybe I should give her what she gave me for my birthday? A big fat nothing. And I guess she forgot last Christmas she acted like a total bitch and dropped the divorce bomb days after.

So yeah, the holidays are super festive this year.

(sarcasmsarcasmsarcasm)

Then there is the not knowing what is going on in with the boy. Who knows anymore. We’re happy though. Kinda? Just very confused.

Oh and I’m helping launch a huge project in less than a month for the internship. I’m working on a pitch that will hopefully wow bloggers. But really, how wierd is it being on the opposite end of pitches? I have to say, I’m not a fan of writing them. I’d much rather be recieving them.

And when I get like this, I eat. Stress, sad, mad – eat eat eat. Why I can’t I be one of those who just can’t look at food when they are upset instead of shoveling it all in my face?

There you have it. I’m confused, angry, stressed, fat, not feeling very Christmasy.

What else would I like for the holidays?

To lose thirty pounds, a vacation and most of all, some fucking clarity.

45 Comments ( Reply )

LizSara
Dec 20, 2008 @ 6:58 pm

Darling girl, you need some time out. even if it’s only a couple of days over the holidays just for you, something has to let you relax.

I don’t know what it is with you Chicago girls and trying to have it all right now but you are going to burn yourself out if you let other people’s stresses get to you so much.

Oh and diets are for new year, mine fell out the window about 3 weeks ago and i don’t care until Jan 5th at least.

Have fun your way, how you want to, with who you want to and don’t let anyone else tell you that you shouldn’t

most of all have many virtual (and real) cuddles ((((((((((()))))))))))

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Angela
Dec 20, 2008 @ 7:45 pm

It seems like, for most people, the holidays are either really happy and joyful, or lousy. When the holidays are great, normal days don’t compare. But when the holidays are lousy, we just want them to be over, and how sad is THAT? I feel where you’re coming from.

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ANG*
Dec 20, 2008 @ 7:51 pm

i’m right there with ya. i don’t know what it is about this year, but i just cant get in the spirit. i can put on a pretty good show, most of the time…but ughhhh i’m in a serious funk.

at least you have that adorable pup to cuddle with!

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k
Dec 20, 2008 @ 8:11 pm

Hugs… Gotta take the wins and the losses. I feel the same way though. Not christmasy. What does help is some christmas music. There’s something about madonna singing santa baby.

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tia
Dec 20, 2008 @ 8:27 pm

i want to hug you.

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bFlat
Dec 20, 2008 @ 8:46 pm

Hopefully Edie is helping you through these rough times. You know once it hits rock bottom you can only go up!

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Katie
Dec 20, 2008 @ 8:57 pm

Sing it sister, sing it. I feel you. Right there – right now. And I’m in Chicago to boot. Huzzah to you. You are not alone!

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erin
Dec 20, 2008 @ 8:58 pm

hugs…

sorry to hear that lady…i totally get the downer feelings around this time of year.

here’s to 09 being much better, especially with some dinner plans at gejas?

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The Modern Gal
Dec 20, 2008 @ 9:09 pm

I’m sorry to hear things are so sticky right now. I hope that you at least get a chance to take a breather this week. Hugs.

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Erin
Dec 20, 2008 @ 10:00 pm

Yuck. I’m sorry things are so crappy right now. Family stuff is the worst during the holidays. I’ll be sending happy thoughts your way!

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mandy
Dec 20, 2008 @ 10:29 pm

Give Edie a great big hug and take a deep breath. Take some time for yourself and remember that this too shall pass.

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Gooseberried
Dec 20, 2008 @ 10:51 pm

xoxoxoxoxo

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emily
Dec 21, 2008 @ 12:26 am

I’m not feeling the holiday spirit this year either. I hope that things get less stressful and confusing soon!

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emmysuh
Dec 21, 2008 @ 12:44 am

Boo. Sorry you’re feeling down about Christmas. Hope you feel better soon!

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Jessica Maria
Dec 21, 2008 @ 2:09 am

many hugs. hope the spirit just hits late this year and you get some of those presents…xoxoxo

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Maxie
Dec 21, 2008 @ 10:58 am

oh, Jamie. I don’t have any christmas spirit, but if I did I’d pass some your way.

And don’t worry about wowing bloggers– we’re easy to please

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Vanessa
Dec 21, 2008 @ 11:10 am

Sorry things are not so happy for you right now. Family crap always seems magnified a thousand percent at the holidays. Your Mom sounds like she has lost her mind with expectations like that. Hopefully things will sort out soon.

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thatShortChick
Dec 21, 2008 @ 11:54 am

sounds like you deserve a mini vacay away from everyone.

hope things turn around for you, though.

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liz
Dec 21, 2008 @ 12:21 pm

Everything bad in life seems about ten times worse during the holidays. For me everything seems like shit right for me right now too. What I have learned from the past is to keep your head up and try to make the most of the situation. Focus on the positive.

Be strong girl

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Kate
Dec 21, 2008 @ 12:56 pm

Oh, sweetie, serious virtual hugs to you. Next year do Christmas vaca with your boy or a good friend in someplace warm and tropical. That’s where I’ll be! Snorkeling and forgetting all the family bullshit.

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Jessica NBP
Dec 21, 2008 @ 1:17 pm

OH MAN HUGS!!! I’m so sorry about all that. Just stay positive. I’m not quite there either but I have a few gifts under the tree but those are ones that aren’t from Santa. LOL I’m sure I’ll get fully there Wednesday night.

HUGS again.

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Ginger
Dec 21, 2008 @ 1:33 pm

You need some down time, minus family, work and worry! (Trust me, I know the feeling.)

Try to give yourself some time as a Christmas gift to you…even if it’s just one afternoon–you deserve it!

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Rachel M.
Dec 21, 2008 @ 1:34 pm

I send you mama hugs and I promise to be wowed by whatever you produce during your internship

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rachel
Dec 21, 2008 @ 2:40 pm

sending you hugs from one bah-humbug to another. i can’t wait for it to be over and things to be back to normal ASAP.

you don’t need to lose 30 pounds, i’ve FB stalked you enough to say that with some serious conviction.

i love youuuuu!

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Morgan
Dec 21, 2008 @ 2:48 pm

In my opinion, it’s important to be honest rather than forcing the holiday cheer; otherwise you forget what the real joy feels like. Yay for honesty, and thanks for sharing- we’re all in this together.

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Meghan
Dec 21, 2008 @ 3:02 pm

I’m sorry that the Christmas spriti isn’t there (I find this year it isn’t for a lot including myself) and find that the holidays can be stressful. Do what you want, pet Edie and stop feeling guilty about eating.And us bloggers are going to love whatever you have to share. Hugs.

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amy
Dec 21, 2008 @ 5:16 pm

i can relate on the eating. every day in the office there is seriously a buffet of baking and sweets. i feel disgusting but i keep eating away.

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Sarah
Dec 21, 2008 @ 5:31 pm

i hope things get better jamie. i feel ya on the happy and confused part. i just ended up letting it all go…what a relief.

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Jessica
Dec 21, 2008 @ 6:24 pm

I’m sorry things are so tough at home. That definitely makes it hard at the holidays when you’re trying to be festive. Call anytime to talk, I’ve definitely been there.

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Julie Q
Dec 21, 2008 @ 8:48 pm

[hugs from the east coast]

and yeah, i’m kinda in loser denial with christmas being 3.5 days away and i still haven’t done 70% of my shopping. plus divorce does have a way of fucking up the holidays. that’s what espresso martinis are for

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michelle woo
Dec 21, 2008 @ 11:46 pm

Big hug, Jamie! You seem like you’ve been doing some amazing things — the internship, the shopping blog, this blog, wowza! You’re the last person in the universe who should feel like a slacker. Hope things turn around. You deserve better. So glad I “met” you this year. =)

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Maris
Dec 22, 2008 @ 8:05 am

I think you need to take a day off, get a massage and forget about EVERYTHING! Take some time for yourself to relax and you’ll be surprised how much clarity you will get!

I’m sorry things are crappy with your family – the holidays always do bring out the best of them, don’t they? You’re not alone there!

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Mermanda
Dec 22, 2008 @ 1:16 pm

*HUGS* It is so easy to let this supposedly joyful season bring us down when it doesn’t live up to expectations. I hope you find true happiness around the corner. xoxo

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Hope
Dec 22, 2008 @ 2:07 pm

I’m so sorry Jaime…. I know it doesn’t help but we are all in the same boat and here for you…..

xoxo

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brookem
Dec 22, 2008 @ 2:23 pm

aww lady, i hear you. so not in the spirit this year either. here’s to getting through the season as best we can (i like to add in some vodka to help), and a better 09.

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mel
Dec 22, 2008 @ 2:55 pm

Here’s to 2009!

You need a vacay.

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katelin
Dec 22, 2008 @ 7:10 pm

jamie i say you win the lotto, come on out to california, and although our weather is not very christmassy right now, and we can celebrate christmas together and sing mariah carey very loudly and eat more food than we need to. sound like a plan? okay see you soon!

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Allie
Dec 23, 2008 @ 10:03 am

Oh, I’m so sorry you’re going through all of this. I think it’s doubly hard to be feeling crappy when you feel the pressure to be in the Christmas spirit. Thinking good thoughts for you!

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katie c
Dec 23, 2008 @ 11:55 am

wow. a couple days late, i know. but man – i feel ya. you summed it up: I’m confused, angry, stressed, fat, not feeling very Christmasy.

yep. wtf?!

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Dan Mega
Dec 23, 2008 @ 8:39 pm

Sounds like an opportunity to make lemonade out of lemons huh? That’s what my little brother and I are trying to do for this Christmas!

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Jordyn
Dec 24, 2008 @ 8:34 pm

That all kind of sucks…

…and I’m one of those people who can’t eat when they’re upset. It’s not much fun either.

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E.P.
Dec 28, 2008 @ 12:06 pm

I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this now. It’s no fun.
I hope Christmas was better than you expected it to be. *hugs*

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Kate
Oct 30, 2009 @ 7:48 pm

Oh, sweetie, serious virtual hugs to you. Next year do Christmas vaca with your boy or a good friend in someplace warm and tropical. That's where I'll be! Snorkeling and forgetting all the family bullshit.

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i can’t lie

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Jamie Ann

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